Forgiveness is a drop in the bucket
by Grey Wolf of Xanthus
Summary: After loosing his love Zell finds that forgiveness is not that hard


**Forgiveness is a drop in the bucket**

**By Grey Wolf**

**Disclaimer:** Squaresoft not mine

**Note:** Um Laguna is Squall's father, Quistis and Seifer found out their brother and sister... somehow and Zell and Quistis where dating. BTW soooo sorry for killing her but I needed angst and it kinda wrote itself I swear, hides oh and this is not yaoi, I decided to write something different that sounds like yaoi but is not ;p

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The water rocked and slapped gently against the wooden dock. It was mid twilight and the sun was just dieing on the horizon. The bright reds, oranges and yellows had faded away to the softest of pinks and purple, with blue-ish white coloured clouds hanging onto the fainting light. Behind him the sky was already a deep blue velvet, with the first pinprick of light blinking on in the great emptiness of the sky. The moon hung low on the horizon, peaking out over the otherwise frigid mountains. They seemed to gleam tonight though, as if the shards of ice and snow and frost had saved up all the light of day and now with the coming of the night stared it down mockingly with a light of its own.

The breeze was strangle warm on his skin but not unwelcome or unfamiliar as Zell sat on the dock, drinking in the wood and salt smells of the fresh breeze and the beauty of the dying light. This was where he belonged somehow and always didn't know anymore if the sea was in his blood, or if it was the forest of Timber that ran deep in his bones. He didn't know who he was anymore or where he came from really, but this would always be his home and his Mom would always be that to him, a mother that raised him as her own.

He sighed and pulled off his gloves, looking at his hands in the soft paling light. His hands where far from that, years of training and fighting had left then ruff and scarred and stained with the blood of his enemies. His hands were not the type that would ever hold a woman in the sweet embrace of ultimate union. He closed his eyes and sighed sadly. What had all the fighting get him in the end? A brilliant mind wasted on a body that built itself up and a heart spilt out on loneliness. Oh he had friends, good ones two but Squall and Rinoa where married and expecting there first and Selphie and Irvine had tide the knot the week before… and Quistis, his heart still ached when he though about her, had been killed on a mission to clean out a research lab that had been infested by monsters.

He had loved her, wanted her and worshiped her but she had never known how much. He was planning to as her hand in marriage when she came back, but she never did. And she never would. He looked at the ring in his hand. It was a simple silver band really, but for an inscription declaring his unending love for her. It had been special to him, as it would have been to Quistis too, he had spent hours lovingly crafting it for her with his ruff and scarred hands. He looked back, in the far distance on a hill was her grave, still fresh from the morning, still with the flowers and the tokens of love. Only a simple headstone marked her final resting place.

-Is this how Laguna felt when… when Squall's mother died?- he wondered as he looked at the ring again. He knew he would never love anyone as much as Quistis ever again. He looked back at the Ocean and down at the ring again. Slowly he pulled his arm back to send the ring to it's final resting place but strong hands stop him. He looks back enrage and even more so when he sees who it is.

"Seifer, have you come to mock me in my grief? Am I chickenwuzz for crying over her death? I loved her damn you!" Words flow from him, all his pent up anger and hatred flow from him in words and a fist slamming into the taller blond's chest over and over again but not hard enough to hurt, never hard enough to hurt as much as he did inside. Zell falls to his knees and starts weeping.

Seifer merely looks at him then offers Zell a hand. Seifer's hand was just as ruff and scarred as his, Zell realised as he took it. "I've come to make piece on Quistis' grave Zell, everything I did can never be forgiven, but Quistis believed in second chanced and I want to too. Please let your forgiveness be a drop in the bucket of my redemption." Seifer's eyes where dead, his soul shining through them as a twisted torment. –He's all alone- Zell realized, -just like me- and all the anger melted from him. "Yes Seifer" he whispered to the man before him "I will forgive you"

On top the hill where the dead claimed their rest two men stood, looking down at their loved one. Both their hearts bled for her, for they both loved her in their own way: One as her brother and the as her lover. The smaller of the two places a small silver ring on the tombstone and above them She smiled, both of them would be cared for now, they won't be alone anymore: They had each other and her memory would keep them together, as friends, forever.


End file.
